We often stop "seeing" our partners, replacing them with our frustrations. Choosing love means intentionally looking for their virtues and expressing gratitude for them.
From a spiritual lens, love is often defined by —a Greek term for unconditional, selfless love. This isn't a love based on the worthiness of the recipient, but on the character of the giver.
Most people define love by the "spark"—the rush of dopamine and oxytocin that characterizes the beginning of a relationship. However, feelings are notoriously fickle; they fluctuate based on stress, health, and external circumstances. We often stop "seeing" our partners, replacing them
In many traditions, the divine act of creation is an act of love. Similarly, when we choose to love, we are "creating" a relationship daily. We are not finding a finished product; we are building a sanctuary through repeated, intentional actions. The Mechanics of the Choice
Love as a choice is not a cold or clinical approach; it is the most romantic gesture possible. It says to the other person: "My commitment to you is more powerful than my changing moods or the challenges of the world." It is a sophisticated, high-level way of living that mirrors the enduring nature of the divine. This isn't a love based on the worthiness
When we believe love is a choice, we become "love-creators." We understand that the "dry seasons" are a natural part of the cycle. Instead of asking, "Do I still feel in love?" we ask, "How can I best love my partner today?" This shifts the power back into our hands, providing a stable foundation that can weather any storm.
How does one "choose" love when the feeling isn't present? It involves several daily disciplines: In many traditions, the divine act of creation
When we believe love is an emotion, we become "love-consumers." We stay as long as the product (the feeling) is being delivered. When the feeling fades, we assume the love is gone and leave.